Everything Flooded is on tour until 4 April. Fourteen towns, and none of them has a theatre.Tour dates

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The season

One play on the road, two on the table

We make one new play a year and tour it for four months. Everything below is either booked or honestly described as unfinished.

On now

Everything Flooded

Touring until 4 AprilWritten by Roz Kettle, made by the company

Ninety minutes about a village that has been told it is not worth saving, and the Tuesday that four people spent reading the same letter.

Fifty-one people came to the first performance, in a hall with a flood line painted on the wall at waist height. Nobody had to explain the play to them.

What it is

A village is told that the defence that would keep it dry costs more than the village is worth. Somebody has done the sum. The play is about the four people who read the sum and what each of them does with it on the same Tuesday: the one who fights it, the one who sells up, the one who goes to work as usual, and the one who did the arithmetic in the first place.

Ninety minutes, no interval, four actors, and a floor with two centimetres of water on it that we carry in twelve plastic drums.

What it is not

It is not a play about the weather, and it does not end with everyone agreeing. Three of the fourteen halls on this tour are inside a flood zone. We did not choose them for that; they booked us.

One scene contains a figure, and the figure changes in every town, because the number each place was quoted is different and we go and find it before we arrive.

Practical

  • Ninety minutes straight through. Doors half an hour before.
  • Suitable for fourteen and over. There is swearing and a sustained argument about money.
  • The water is warm, contained, and nobody in the first row gets wet. We tested this properly.
  • Step-free wherever the hall is, and we will say plainly on the phone if a hall is not.

Afterwards

We stay in the room. There is no formal discussion unless a hall asks for one, and about half do. The van is loaded by eleven either way.

From the tour

Four halls, one set

  • The set built on the floor of a primary school hall, chairs on three sides
    Kitterling, primary school hall
  • Twelve plastic drums of water stacked beside a van with the doors open
    The get-in, three hours
  • An actor standing in shallow water under a single work light
    Marsh End, Methodist chapel
  • A full house of a hundred and eighty people on stacking chairs before the play starts
    Cleeve Bay, miners' welfare

Tour dates

Where it is going

Doors at 19:00 unless the hall says otherwise, play at 19:30, out by 22:00. Tickets at the door; the halls take the money and keep it.

Leg one: the marsh road

February. Five dates, four halls that are not theatres.

  1. Fri 6 Feb

    Marsh End

    Methodist chapel, Fore Street

    Pews, no heating until six, and a hundred and ten seats once the front row is taken out.

  2. Sat 7 Feb

    Marsh End

    Methodist chapel, Fore Street

    Second night, added after the first sold out in a week.

  3. Tue 10 Feb

    Nettlefold

    Village hall

    Relaxed performance. House lights half up, door open, come and go as you need.

  4. Thu 12 Feb

    Kitterling

    Primary school hall

    Workshop with the top two years the same morning.

  5. Sat 14 Feb

    Draycott

    Working men's club, back room

    Over eighteens, because of the bar and not because of the play.

Leg two: the coast

March. Five dates and the longest drive of the tour.

  1. Wed 4 Mar

    Cleeve Bay

    Miners' welfare hall

    The biggest room we play. Get-in from noon because of the stairs.

  2. Fri 6 Mar

    Warble Hill

    Rugby club function room

    Captioned performance. The script runs on a screen at the side.

  3. Sat 7 Mar

    Pentrellis

    Community shop and hall

    Two performances, 15:00 and 19:30. The afternoon one is quieter.

  4. Tue 10 Mar

    Fenby

    Library, first floor

    Sixty seats, no more, and they go fast. Ask the library to hold one.

  5. Thu 12 Mar

    Otterburn Cross

    Scout hut

    The smallest room on the tour. Forty people and everybody in the light.

Leg three: home and the hills

Late March and April. Four dates, one of them ours.

  1. Sat 21 Mar

    Corrafield

    Leisure centre, sports hall

    Loud room. We take extra cloth for the walls and it is worth it.

  2. Wed 25 Mar

    Hallowmere

    Memorial institute

    Free to anybody who lives in the parish, paid for by the hall.

  3. Sat 28 Mar

    Stannerbridge

    Stannerbridge Baths, our room

    Home dates. Eighty seats around the empty pool, and the acoustic is strange in a way we have learned to use.

  4. Sat 4 Apr

    Stannerbridge

    Stannerbridge Baths, our room

    Last night of the tour. The set is taken apart afterwards by whoever stays.

Money

What a ticket costs, and what a booking costs

Both halves are published because the second half is usually hidden.

  • A ticket

    From 00

    Pay what you decide when you arrive. The suggested figure is printed on the poster; people pay above it about as often as below.

  • Under eighteens

    00

    Free at every date, with or without an adult, including the ones in clubs where we have asked for an exception.

  • A booking for your hall

    00

    One flat fee for the performance, the get-in, the get-out and the workshop the next morning. You keep the door money, whatever it is.

    • Six people and one van
    • A three-hour get-in and a two-hour get-out
    • Posters and a listing you can copy
    • A workshop the following morning
    Ask about a date
  • If your hall cannot find the fee

    From 00

    Say so in the first email. We hold four dates a tour for halls that cannot pay the full figure and we do not make anybody explain themselves twice.

Tickets are taken at the door by the hall, in cash or by card, and the hall keeps every penny. Nobody is asked to prove anything.

In development

What is being written

Described as it actually stands, which is the only useful way to describe it.

  • A disused weighbridge plate set into a concrete yard

    The Weighbridge

    Play, four actorsReading in June, touring 2027

    A haulage yard, a weighbridge that has not been used for eleven years, and three brothers who cannot agree what the land under it is worth. Two acts written, and the second one is forty minutes too long.

  • A reel-to-reel recorder and notebooks on a kitchen table

    Milk Round

    Play with music, three actorsWorkshop in September

    Made with the last two dairy families in one valley, from thirty hours of recorded conversation. We have the recordings and no play yet.

  • A bus stop sign propped against a chapel wall

    The Last Bus from Hallow

    Revival, one actorFrom 2 May

    Our first show, made in 2021 for nineteen people in a chapel. Same script, same set, same actor, five years older, which turns out to change it.

  • A play we abandoned

    Not happening2025

    Eight months of work on a play about a hospital closure that we could not make honest. It is listed here because the money spent on it was real.

No date near you?

Tell us which hall and who holds the keys. We plan the next tour in October and we take the routes that people ask for first.

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Theatre company

Six people, one van, and a swimming baths with no water in it. We make new plays and take them to towns that have nowhere to put one.

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